


One More Minute

by gyu_trashling (ladynoirsdaughter)



Series: One More... [1]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Confessions, Confrontations, Heartbreak, M/M, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-25
Updated: 2017-01-25
Packaged: 2018-09-19 21:13:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9460604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladynoirsdaughter/pseuds/gyu_trashling
Summary: Mingyu remembers the day, the hour, the location of their break up. He wasn't expecting Wonwoo to remember as well.





	

**Author's Note:**

> In case you haven't realised I love angst. These two are my OTP what am I doing oh my god. Hope you like it!!

Mingyu doesn’t know where he went wrong or what changed the boy’s mind. All he knows is that he woke up one day and Wonwoo told him he didn’t want to be with him anymore. It was tough, considering they lived together with eleven other boys who knew a lot about the situation, so for them to find Mingyu crying in the dorm was nothing but a worry. Wonwoo was confronted by the hyungs, even given a lecture and warning and everything else, but it didn’t change his mind. Wonwoo never went back to Mingyu, and it killed the boy every single day.

That was almost a year ago. Mingyu is still dying inside, and it doesn’t seem like it will ever go away. He tried distracting himself by spending time and interacting with the other members, and a lot of the time he wouldn’t even bother drowning over Wonwoo, but those days where it was just the four of them, the Hip Hop Unit, he’d try and sit with Seungcheol and Hansol between them, or at least one so he didn’t have to lose his mind. It was tough when they had rehearsal or went over dances when they decided to change it up, the songs that involved them being next to each other or somewhat close leaving Mingyu to take a deep breath and remember that he was working - there was no time for heartbreak.

Wonwoo didn’t help the situation considering he acted like nothing was wrong. He was probably over it and took Mingyu’s distance as normal now, knowing they weren’t as close after they debuted before getting close again, and they drifted even more when they broke up. Wonwoo probably didn’t even notice the bags under Mingyu’s eyes or how his body became thinner (though he was miraculously still growing) over the time. Nobody really said anything, or tried to bring it up. But they could all tell how Mingyu would shy away from the older boy in the dorms.

He would put on a smile and stand near or beside him when the cameras were on, rest a hand on his shoulder or laugh at his lame jokes during fansigns and concerts, initiate skinship or have a full blown conversation when someone was watching. but every time the interview finished or they went backstage or he was suddenly alone, Mingyu would stop pretending. It was so hard to pretend all the time, and every once in a while, he would regret taking the opportunity to live the idol life.

But every time he was recording with Jihoon or Soonyoung was teaching him a dance or they were out for dinner as a group or got to interact with so many fans, he’d realise just how lucky he was and that he was privileged to be that position. It took so many years and such hard work to get to where he was and he couldn’t throw it away like it was nothing.

Whenever he was left alone with Wonwoo, or they ran into each other in the middle of something, the older boy would greet him or start a conversation that Mingyu had to put up a front for and play along with. He didn’t want Wonwoo to see how pathetic he was for still holding on to what they had and wishing for it back. He couldn’t act like simply seeing Wonwoo made him feel dead inside.

The day came around. One year since Wonwoo gave up on their relationship. Mingyu remembered the exact day, the hour, and where he was when it happened. Maybe it was stupid and selfish, but he wanted to be in that place at that hour again, just to see if they pain would be better or worse.

So when the rest of the group left the dance studio just after five o’clock, all wanting to go home and rest after the busy schedule, Mingyu stayed behind in his trance of ‘wanting to get this dance right’. No one said anything about it, considering he actually did struggle with stepping and moving his body in a certain way. Soonyoung offered to help but he’d been in the studio for a week until the early hours and Mingyu didn’t want to deprive him of sleep even at an early hour.

For who knows how long Mingyu danced and practiced and remembered how the steps were laid out, having done them a million times but almost always not moving to the left far enough, and he finally understood he had to pivot before stepping out. He went over it for what felt like a million more times, always making sure he got that small turn right before moving. It felt like a victory and he continued to do it, practicing new ones with which he felt he was lacking.

Mingyu never liked to watch the videos of himself performing. It was caught on camera early in their new era when they watched it backstage, how whenever he came on screen his smile would drop and he’d go silent, watching intently before perking back up and enjoying it when another member was shown. He was critical of so many things he did no matter what people said. He blamed it on his height - how his body couldn’t bend far enough or his feet would be too close together or how he simply stood above everyone else and he was always seen. It was worse when he had the blond hair he was made to have. He found it different and new, but it caused him to stand out in a crowd as it was more white than anything, and of course, his height. He just hated so much of himself because of the things he was unable to control.

Like he couldn’t stop Wonwoo from ending things. He had to stop dancing and take a few deep breaths, trying to stop his heart from climbing up his throat. A lump was forming that he tried to swallow around, knowing it wasn’t really possible. He checked the clock on the wall - 5:47. Five more minutes.

Turning back to face the mirror, Mingyu taking one last breath before going over the dance again, watching his actions in the reflection. He forgot the pivot.

Quickly picking up his things he left the practice room, seeing there were roughly two minutes to get to his destination. It was a short walk but he would no doubt be slow with it. The building still held staff in the main rooms which he avoided easily, stepping past someone he’d see with a small bow before continuing. He reached small studio at 5:51, less than a minute to go. The lump in his throat seemed to grow bigger as he stood outside the door, mentally preparing himself (and failing) for the tsunami of feelings and emotions to sweep over him. It wasn’t like he was going to perform in a new country or host an award show or anything. It was simply entering a room and reminiscing. Thinking about it now, the whole plan was a bad idea.

5:52.

Opening the door he stepped in, but didn’t even get to close the door before he saw another person inside. Wonwoo. He turned to look at him when hearing the noise, putting down his phone on the table.

“Sorry, didn’t realise anyone was in here.” He made the effort to step back but was stopped almost immediately.

“You can stay. You seem to have a reason to be here.”

Mingyu hesitated. Why was Wonwoo even there? Surely he didn’t remember the event as well as Mingyu did. But he had to take this leap and do what he had planned instead of backing out just because of the person he encountered.

He stepped inside the room and closed the door, leaning against it with his eyes focused on the carpet below him. It still held that ugly look of being itchy and worn if you were to touch it, something he once tested and learnt it to be true.

Neither of the boys said anything and stood in silence together, almost wishing this wasn’t happening. Almost. Mingyu felt a tiny spark of hope in his chest at the fact that Wonwoo was here at this time like it was planned between them, but he also felt sick to his stomach because for the past year Wonwoo hasn’t seemed to have cared about his feelings.

Mingyu didn’t know what to do in this situation. He felt drained and tired, like he was played in a way, but most of all, the heartbreak became worse.

“Do you remember it? How I stood here while you told me you didn’t love me anymore? Do you remember the look on my face and how I begged for you to change your mind?” Heartbreak turned to hurt, which made him feel pathetic, and Mingyu has had enough of feeling pathetic.

“I remember.”

“What about how I began to cry while you couldn’t even look at me?”

“Yes.”

“How you left me here to fall apart while you went back to the dorms and spent time with the others, saying I stayed behind to practice?”

“Yes.”

“Then why are you here?” His voice became louder in the small room, Wonwoo flinching in the slightest, Mingyu finally seeing him in a way that he hadn’t for a long time.

“I knew you would be here.” It was a stupid answer to the younger boy, one that made the lump in his throat grow more.

He watched Wonwoo carefully, noting how he still pulled on his sweater so the sleeves covered his hands and how he picked at his nails. Mingyu saw how he brought his arms into his body to become smaller, head lowered. He felt targeted, nervous, uneasy.

It was almost satisfying to see him this way, Mingyu thought, because it was how he’s felt for so long and he’s never been able to truly get rid of the feeling. But it also made him upset because Wonwoo has no right to feel like this after how he’s treated him.

“You think you can just come in here at this time in my life and pretend it isn’t a big deal? That you being here is okay? It’s not. It makes me wonder just how much more you plan on hurting me. Because I have been suffering the past year Wonwoo, all because of you and I can’t get over it. Not after everything you did and everything you made me feel.”

Mingyu was hurt. Hurt in every way possible. Wonwoo being here at this hour, on this day, just made everything one thousand times worse for him. Mingyu came here to think everything over, sort out his thoughts and feelings, and maybe then he could begin to let go of his past and his love for Wonwoo. He was planning to take back his heart so it wasn’t being stood on anymore, but now? He knew he would never get it back.

Wonwoo meant too much to Mingyu, as both a team member and a friend. He had captured his heart when they were trainees and over time he accepted his feelings, and their friendship grew to more. Both of them were worried about things like fan service and rumours and being found out, but the other members accepted them and let them be and gave them the support they deserved.

Looking back now, it was almost humorous how he’d told his hyungs they didn’t need to be rude to Wonwoo when they confronted him about the break up. How he drilled it into their brains that he was okay and he would get over it soon enough because simply being friends and in the same group was still good enough. Mingyu almost laughed out loud when thinking over it because here he was, telling Wonwoo how he felt and how much he hurt him and that no, he never got over it.

Mingyu checked the clock. 6:01. They’d been in silence for awhile since Mingyu entered the room, their words somewhat slow and the spaces between them stretching a few times. He didn’t want to really be there anymore, because all Wonwoo was doing was staying silent and casually admitting he knew how much he hurt the younger boy.

“I’ve felt nothing but pathetic since then, and you can’t even look at me and tell me why you did it.”

Wonwoo seemed to shake, a small choked noise echoing out. Mingyu didn’t care if the boy cried because he’d already wasted too many tears on him. Something about seeing Wonwoo like this made Mingyu feel like the boy deserved it.

“It would have been better if you just told me why you did it when it happened, because then maybe I could have stopped caring a year ago.” The hurt was anger and the pain was in his bones and his voice cracked a few times but all Mingyu knew is that Wonwoo finally understood. Maybe a year too late, but he finally knew.

“I’m sorry, Mingyu.”

Wonwoo looked up at him then, tears streaming down his cheeks and bottom lip shaking and he’d never seen him truly cry as he would always hide it. Something inside was screaming at him to feel guilty, but really, there was no point anymore.

“So am I. But you don’t deserve to hear me say those words.” Mingyu stepped forward so he was in front of him, towering over the older boy as he had curled in on himself during the time they were in the room together. He looked so small and scared and even sorry, but Mingyu couldn’t take it. Wonwoo reached out his hand to hold at the younger’s shirt, curling his fingers around the material like a lifeline. Mingyu let him, for a short time, drown in his pain and tears like he’d experienced often, before taking his hand and pulling it away from him. Wonwoo didn’t want to let go of him and laced their fingers, Mingyu also allowing it.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you so much. I know I did and I’m sorry, but I didn’t mean it.”

“I know Wonwoo. But you still did it.”

The boy continued to cry, the small sobs and intakes of air being noisy in the small silent room. Mingyu took note of how his hand was warm against Wonwoo’s which was cold, the contrast of tan skin meeting pale. He felt how their fingers fit between each other so easily and how bony the older’s hand was. He missed the random times they would link fingers and hold each other, never moving too far away as they would be approached or pulled back by the feel of a hand in their own.

Mingyu missed being with Wonwoo. But he couldn’t take him back.

He gently let go of Wonwoo and stepped back, noting how the older reached forward like he used to when things were okay between them, and how he stopped himself and retreated when it all started to go downhill. One thing he noticed after the relationship ended.

“We can’t fix this Wonwoo. You can’t try to make things better by being here and apologising. I can’t forgive you like that.”

The clock read 6:13. One more minute.

“I can’t pretend you didn’t break my heart, but I’m not going to act like I’m okay either.” He continued to step back and turned to rest his hand on the door handle, hearing Wonwoo speak one last time.

“Mingyu, I’m so sorry.”

Opening the door he finally let his feelings give way, one tear falling and his voice cracking around the lump in his throat that he knew, truly, would never go away.

“I know, and I am too.” He stepped out of the studio and closed the door, finally letting go.

6:14. The end to their relationship.


End file.
